How Old Is Obi Wan When He Dies
Alright, gather 'round, folks. I've got a tale to tell you about our favorite old Jedi, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You know, the guy who looks like he's been sitting under a tree for cen...
Alright, gather 'round, folks. I've got a tale to tell you about our favorite old Jedi, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You know, the guy who looks like he's been sitting under a tree for centuries, waiting for a certain young Skywalker to show up. But how old is he when he finally kicks the bucket? Let's dive in, shall we?
Let's Start at the Beginning
So, Obi-Wan is born on the humble planet of Stewjay, right? That's right, folks. Stewjay. I know, I know, it sounds like a soup, but it's actually a planet. And our little Obi-Wan is born there, probably looking like a tiny, wrinkly old man even then. I mean, have you seen those baby pictures? The kid's got more wrinkles than a Shar-Pei!
Anyway, he's discovered by Qui-Gon Jinn, who's like, "Hey, this kid's got the Force. Let's take him to Coruscant and make him a Jedi." And off they go. Obi-Wan's probably thinking, "Wow, I'm like, what, six? And I'm already leaving home? This is gonna be a long life." Little did he know...
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Training Days
Obi-Wan's trained by Yoda, which is like being trained by a tiny, green, walking Muppet. But Yoda's no joke. He makes Obi-Wan do all sorts of crazy stuff, like lift rocks with the Force and meditate for hours. Obi-Wan's probably thinking, "I'm like, a hundred now, and I still can't get the hang of this lightsaber stuff."
But he sticks with it. He becomes a Jedi Knight, fights in the Clone Wars, and even takes on a Padawan of his own - Anakin Skywalker. And that's where things get... interesting.
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May the Force Be With You (Until It Isn't)
Obi-Wan trains Anakin, who's like a son to him. They fight together, they laugh together, they probably even cried together over a good movie. But then, the dark side happens. Anakin turns into Darth Vader, and Obi-Wan's like, "Well, that's a bummer."
They have their big lightsaber duel on Mustafar, and Obi-Wan wins, but he doesn't kill Anakin. He just leaves him there, all burned up and sad. Then he goes into hiding, probably thinking, "I'm like, what, 55? And I've already got one foot in the grave. This is gonna be a long retirement."
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The Big Finish
Obi-Wan spends the next 19 years hanging out on Tatooine, watching over young Luke Skywalker. He's probably thinking, "I'm like, a hundred and something now. When's this kid gonna grow up and save the galaxy already?"
Finally, Luke shows up, and Obi-Wan's like, "Hey, kid. I've been waiting for you. Now let's go find your sister and take down the Emperor." And off they go. But then, Obi-Wan has a big moment of self-sacrifice, and he gets Force-choked by the Emperor. He's probably thinking, "Well, that's that. I'm like, a gazillion years old now. Time to call it a day."
And that, my friends, is how Obi-Wan Kenobi goes out - with a bang, not a whimper. He's probably the oldest Jedi who ever lived, and he's got the wrinkles to prove it. So here's to you, Obi-Wan. May the Force be with you... forever.